Category Archives: Messages From the Editor

Beware!— Dead-Eyed “Zombie Joe” Has Arrived

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The Walking Dead— Right out of the box, this new “black & white” 12″ club exclusive figure from the GIjOE Collector’s Club strikes many as, well, “DEAD” looking. It may be hard to see from this photo, but in person, our newly nicknamed, “Zombie Joe,” has a gray body that also (inexplicably) has a greenish hue to it, adding to its already moribund effect. Combined with EXTREMELY droopy eyes, ol’ “ZJ” appears destined to “haunt” collector’s shelves—or parts bins. (Photo: Mark Otnes) Click to enlarge.

Is this REALLY the FINAL “membership exclusive” figure for fans of 12-Inch GIJOEs?

It’s rare that a package containing a brand-new GIjOE shows up, unannounced, in our company’s mailroom; but today was just such an occasion. Typically, such unplanned, “surprise” events have been met with grand celebrations among the overworked staffers here at The Joe Report, but sadly, today, that was not to be the case. When the receptionist dropped the morning mail onto my desk—I literally JUMPED out of my chair. I saw the box from the GIjOE club and immediately buzzed everyone’s intercom, calling for an urgent “all hands on deck” meeting in the conference room.

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Ol’ “Dead Eyes”— Without a doubt, “Zombie Joe” wins the prize for having the DEADEST-looking eyes of ANY GIjOE brand action figure ever made. Depending on the steadiness of your hand and the fine point of your paintbrush, corrections CAN be made. But if you’re one of those fans who are “artistically-challenged,” you may just have to LIVE with it. CREEPY! (Photo: Mark Otnes) Click to enlarge.

Standing elbow to elbow, we happily ringed around the massive, oblong conference table, our hands wringing and our breath held “in toto” in silent, anxious anticipation. As we all knew, first glimpses and first impressions were EVERYTHING whenever a new Joe joined our ranks, and this unusual figure would prove to be no exception. The room fell DEATHLY quiet (a term that would prove to be quite apropos) and as the plain, “coffin-style” mailing box was finally opened, the first, HONEST reactions from those present plunged wildly from eager, ecstatic anticipation—to stunned, silent SHOCK. A “temp” from the upstairs steno pool audibly gasped. A copywriter, unsure of exactly how she might describe or “spin” what she seeing, simply giggled. One of our “street-wise” freelance photographers actually seemed to recoil—but in what? Fear? HORROR? It wasn’t exactly clear. Finally, someone managed to speak up and blurted out, “What IS that thing?”

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Super Surfer Shorts— The BEST thing about the new 12-inch exclusive figure from the GIJOE Collector’s Club is—without a doubt—his classic GIjOE logo boxer shorts. The vintage logo imprinted on them looks FANTASTIC and these nifty new “jams” will undoubtedly become highly-prized collectibles on their own, despite the “less-than-lively” figure they adorn. (Photo: Mark Otnes) Click to enlarge.

Bottom Line: Hello there, Zombie Joe! What stared up at us from that cardboard coffin box was indeed a shocking sight to many. It can only be described as some sort of gray/greenish “corpse-like” figure. Comparisons to zombies and TV’s “The Walking Dead” quickly come to mind, but the most common appellation that came up among our group was “lifeless.” Of all the GIjOEs we’ve ever seen, and believe me, we’ve seen a LOT of them, this is the most… DEAD looking. Oh well, a “dead” GIjOE will certainly find a place in many sci-fi or other such 1:6 scale custom dioramas. If you can think of a good use for this figure, please let us know. Without his “black & white” uniform, he’s quite literally, “lifeless.” But heck, a Joe is a Joe—is a JOE. We’ll take ’em ALL!

 

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Happy “Victory in Europe” (VE) Day!

Bottom Line: The freedom-loving peoples of the world have so much to be thankful for, especially to the men and women of the “Greatest Generation” who responded to the allied call to subdue and defeat Hitler’s Nazi forces, the military might of the Empire of Japan, and all the other axis nations of WWII. Please, don’t let this day go by without giving thanks to at least ONE veteran of the armed forces. Thank you, ALL Veterans!

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(Photos: AP)

“The Joe Report” Continued to Add Subscribers and Break G.I. Joe Fan Readership Records in 2015

Our stats in 2015 were staggering. Everything trended higher and higher. Our most read article was an exclusive interview we held with Hasbro's own, Derryl DePriest. But that was only one of hundreds of new

Our readership stats in 2015 were literally staggering. Everything trended higher, with our most-read article being an exclusive interview with Hasbro’s own, Derryl DePriest (see HERE). (Graphic: WordPress)

Conquering the World— Shaded countries indicate where our readers resided in 2015. We're still working on ways to crack China's governmental censorship, Greenland's lack of humans, and the Middle East's fanatical dislike for action figures and toys in general. Oh well, onward and upward! (Graphic: WordPress)

Conquering the World?— In this official statistical map provided to us by WordPress, the shaded countries indicate where readers of The Joe Report resided in 2015. As you can see, other than North Korea, Afghanistan, Iran and Greenland, we’re doing VERY well! (Graphic: WordPress)

Bottom Line: We had a very good 2015—thanks to YOU, our loyal readers. Article publication was up. Reader comments were up. Overall viewership from fans in countries all around the world—was up, up, UP. We want to sincerely thank each and every one of you for your faithful subscriptions and insightful intel. Without your assistance, production of The Joe Report would not be possible. We’d also like to wish everyone reading this message a very healthy and Happy New Year in 2016. We’ll see you all again, next year. GO, JOE! —Sincerely, Mark Otnes, Editor of The Joe Report.

Please Remember Those Who Died Today, 9/11/2001


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We will never forget 9/11. Please take this moment to remember all of the innocent civilians, first responders and military personnel who lost their lives that day. May they rest in peace.

Happy Birthday, USA! Happy Independence Day!

Gigantic US Flag, Naval Aviation Museum, Pensacola, FL (Photo: Mark Otnes)

Gigantic US Flag, Naval Aviation Museum, Pensacola, FL (Photo: Mark Otnes)

Stormy Skies Unlikely to Deter Thousands of Die-Hard G.I. Joe Fans From Attending JoeCon

Serious rain is falling all across Illinois at the moment, but it's unlikely to effect the action occurring largely indoors at this year's JoeCon 2015 in Springfield, IL. (Photo: Ev Cabrera Marinucci)

Button up and put the Pedal to the Metal Heavy rains currently falling across Illinois are unlikely to effect the turnout at this year’s JoeCon 2015 being held in Springfield. (Photo: Ev Cabrera Marinucci)

Bottom Line: Well, the sun is up but we can’t see it through all the rain, lightning and tumbling thunderheads. Nonetheless, fans from all over the U.S. will be headed to Illinois’ capital city this weekend for 3 days of fun with the world’s favorite action figure—GIjOE. Just a heads up though, whether you’re on the road or up in the air, THIS is what it looks like down here on the ground. It’s raining cats-n-dogs at the moment (great for when we plant corn and soybeans later this month), but we don’t think the storms will have ANY effect on the thousands of excited fans who’re planning to attend. Safe travels, everyone. Hope to see you soon. Go, JOE!

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Remembering Martin Luther King on MLK Day 2015

DiD's Martin Luther King action figure features extraordinary facial and clothing details. Out-STANDING! (Photo: DiD)

DiD’s Martin Luther King action figure features extraordinary facial and clothing details. (Photo: DiD)

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DiD has introduced two versions of MLK, one speaking and one not (shown above). You also have a choice of preacher’s robes, black suit-n-tie, and an outstanding speaker’s podium. We’re not sure about this face-sculpt, however. It seems a little off. (Photo: DiD)

Bottom Line: I was only 7 years old when the Reverend Martin Luther King was assassinated on April 4, 1968. At the time, I was probably out playing in the backyard with GIjOEs or other such action figures, wholly unaware of the tragic events that had just occurred in faraway Memphis, Tennessee. Now, 47 years later, I’m an adult and I’m still playing with my Joes out in the backyard. But I never “dreamed” that MLK would someday be immortalized into a 1:6 scale figure as well. Surprisingly, after a quick Google search, I discovered that such a figure has indeed been created. And it’s AMAZING!

As you can see by these photos, the new MLK figure is yet another outstanding creation from DiD based on a real-life historical figure, and it comes with a variety of related clothing and accessory options. We’re not going to review this figure in any detail here, but the pics provided by the company speak volumes.

After reminiscing about MLK (the man), we realized that while most of the world has heard his marvelous “I Have a Dream” speech, many had probably never heard the final speech he gave prior to his death. Surprisingly, and very sadly, it proved to be quite prophetic. Please take a moment to remember this important American by viewing the short video clip below.

Absolutely AMAZING details and likeness. WOW! (Photo: DiD)

DiD’s new MLK figure boasts absolutely near-perfect details, fit and quality. WOW! (Photo: DiD)

The MLK speech podium is a miniature 1:6 scale work of art all unto itself. Imagine all the uses for this! (Photo: DiD)

MLK’s speech podium is a miniature 1:6 scale work of art unto itself. (Photo: DiD)

The detail and accuracy of the podium's microphones lend superb realism to this diorama! (Photo: DiD)

The detail of MLK’s podium microphones lend realism to ANY 1:6 “speaker” diorama. (Photo: DiD)

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Who is it? Is DiD’s closed-mouth headsculpt an overweight Eddie Murphy or MLK? The jury’s still out, but take a look at his superb suit details; perfect fit, nice tie and you even get little “equality” and 1:6 scale “Jobs & Freedom” buttons. March on! (Photo: DiD)

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france+flagBottom Line: Today we fly the flag of France in a show of solidarity and support for the concept and ideals of worldwide Freedom of Speech and in memoriam of the Parisian civilians and policemen who lost their lives today. Our prayers and condolences go out to their families as well.

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